I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize