My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He better not be in your backpack
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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