Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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