u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
this just has baby written all over it
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
