but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
