Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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