Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I want to stick my p in your. b.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
