she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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