drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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