Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
