He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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