I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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