just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
