O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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