Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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