How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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