I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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