okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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