Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
