From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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