so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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