Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
