As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
