...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
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