You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Randomize
