Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize