Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
3pm strippers are depressing
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
