no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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