I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Dignity is for republicans.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Randomize
