he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
When did angry sex become our thing?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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