I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
