dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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