I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
