so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
