Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
this will be a night to untag.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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