Porn is love you can see.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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