It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize