doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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