She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
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