I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
