My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
