Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
