Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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