how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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