all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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