Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
