Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
