Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
