11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
