I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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